Sunday, June 12, 2011
Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again knowing good and well what the outcome is going to be. This describes the old me perfectly. Why do we as addicts go round and round the same vicious cycle expecting the outcome to be different. It's kind of like we don't want order in our lives. Like we crave the chaos and disorder because that's whats normal to us. But normal people want structure and order in their lives. Even though some people would argue that's insane. Our insanity causes our family's to worry about us constantly. Our insanity causes us financial problems. It even makes us do things that we would never do sober. Such as stealing from family and friends. I was so insane I didn't even think it was wrong to go in my wife's pocket book and take money. My insanity told me what's her's is mine and what's mine is her's. The problem with that was I didn't have shit because I had either snorted it up my nose, drank it, or popped it in my mouth. If your reading this and your insane be grateful that there is a way out. You have got to want it, it's not easy, it's an everyday job. You are never recovered from insanity your always going to be recovering, because if you let your guard down it's right back and you'll be insaner than you were before. So good luck and God Bless all you addicts and recovering addicts out there.