Thursday, June 23, 2011

Addict + Addict = Relapse

If you really want to get sober or clean you will not start a relationship in rehab or right after you get out of rehab. I mean whats safer one addict's brain trying to stay clean with its triggers or two addict's brains with double the triggers. Then you add in the stress of starting a new relationship. Some may argue that two addicts being together are two sets of eyes looking out for triggers but that's bullshit. It's wo sets of eyes looking for dope. These people sit in rehab getting angry because the staff of the rehab are doing all they can to keep them sepeerated. All day long their minds are either on the staff because they are mad at them for keeping the two addicts apart. Or they are trying to figure out how to sneak around to see each other. Or they are just thinking of each other. The problem here is that this doesn't leave much time to focus on their recovery. I'm an addict that used to married to an addict and beleive me when I tell you that this doesn't work. Because -1+-1=-2, on the days she wanted to use and I didn't I would end up using anyway because she would be using in front of me and vise versa. But my wife today is a non addict. This is negative 1 which is myself plus positive one which is my wife equals zero which is balance for me. (-1+1=0balance)And I firmly believe that having a supportive and loving wife is the reason I'm not dead today. Because now on the days I'm having strong cravings she helps remind me that I'm accountable for my actions and she helps remind me of before when my life was unmanageable and how happy I am now that I'm part of our family again.

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